Most of the time that I was single, I struggled with it. I knew I really wanted to be a wife and mother. I couldn’t figure out what was wrong with me that none of the guys I knew wanted to date me. I wanted someone to spend my time with. I wanted someone to do fun things with. Most of my college years were spent feeling really bitter because I wanted to be married or at least planning a wedding by the time I graduated college. When I think about that time, I can actually laugh about it now.
Let’s take a minute to rewind back to the beginning of 2017. I had just graduated college, was studying for boards and was excited beyond belief to have finally achieved that goal of finishing my nursing degree. I decided to set 2017 as my year to learn about myself. Most of college was lived in survival mode, and I was so excited to finally have time to invest in myself.
One of the things that I ended up doing, after much encouragement from my best friend, was to take myself on a date. I can laugh at it now, but the first week of 2017 I took a break from studying and wrote down a list of goals for the year. And one of them was to take myself on a date. Literally.
I laugh at this now because it has become a part of my life’s routine. I work my days in a row, 6 twelve hour shifts in a row, 8 glorious days off. It gives me the ability to travel to see my boyfriend. And honestly, it’s really nice having 8 days off. I can cook, clean, relax, socialize, introvert — all my needs can be met to prepare myself for my stretch of 6 days. One of the things I do with my first day off and awake during daytime hours is going to staufs for breakfast. I take a book and take myself on a date. I get out of my house. Treat myself to a nice meal, and good coffee and make it a point to spend time with myself.
All of this started because of a conversation with my best friend. I believe she was pregnant with her first child, and in her first year of marriage. Prior to getting married she had a good habit of taking herself out for a meal, and she was telling me how she missed that time. Her time was so much more her own prior to getting married. That conversation really inspired me to embrace and cherish this time in my life, where my time is mostly my own.
She still gets to take time to herself, but I know it looks different and it’s not as frequent.
This week, take yourself on a date. Set aside some time just for you. Whether your date is taking yourself out to a meal at your favorite restaurant or going to your favorite park or kicking everyone out of the house and enjoying a hot bubble bath. Whatever it might be, take time this week, or at least this month to yourself. Spend some time reflecting. Think about your goals and your dreams. Take some time to reflect on this beautiful life.